Reiki 4 Me Blog

In every frustration there is a powerful message. Frustration tells you, in no uncertain terms, that something is not as good as it could possibly be. There's a reason for every frustration. And when you choose to be brutally honest with yourself, there's also a positive and potentially life-changing response.


The best response to frustration is not to fight it or resent it or let it break you down, but to learn from it. Perhaps frustration is attempting to convince you of the need to speak out against injustice, or pointing out changes that you know you must make in your own behavior.


Frustration may very well be telling you that what you're doing at the moment is not at all in line with your most deeply held values. Frustration may be your way of telling yourself that you need to more fully prepare for life's various challenges.


It could be that frustration is helping you to realize that there must be a more effective, more efficient, more compassionate, or more sensible way to do some particular thing. Many great achievements and advances start out as frustrations. Feel the frustration and then listen very carefully.
For that frustration is giving you some priceless advice!

Lightworkers

Stephen Covey, in The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, shares an experience that he once had while traveling on the New York subway. Imagine you are riding the subway early one morning, and everybody appears to be comfortable -- people are drinking their coffee, reading their newspapers and magazines, working on their laptops, talking on their cell phones. Everything is normal and peaceful. At each station, a few people get off, a few people get on, everything is calm and sedate, until the train stops at a particular station and a man walks onto your train car with his little children. He finds seats for them and then sits down in a reflective mood. While he is in deep meditation, the children begin to run up and down the aisle, screaming and shouting, running all over the train car.


HOW DO YOU FEEL? Are you mad at the man? Why are you mad? You are perhaps thinking, This man should take care of his children in public. If he does not know how to take care of children, why did he have them in the first place! Are you mad at the children for making so much noise? Spoiled kids! you might think. You notice there is no mother. Now you might be thinking, I bet the mother left this man with these undisciplined children.


See yourself going up to this irresponsible father and confronting him, saying, "Excuse me, sir, would you mind tending to your children? They're being so disruptive, and I think everybody is getting a little upset." The man looks up at you and says, "Two hours ago these children lost their mother in the hospital. She just died, and ever since then I have been trying to explain to them the death of their mother, and their only reaction is this.
"

Now how do you feel? The children are still jumping up and down, screaming and shouting. But now you feel terrible. You feel guilty. You feel sorry for the man, you feel sorry for the children, and you feel bad about their mother. You might even feel upset with yourself for feeling negatively about the father and his children.


THE POWER OF OUR BELIEFS - I give you this example to demonstrate the power of our beliefs. Emotions are not caused by situations. Emotions are caused by our beliefs about situations, beliefs that color our perception and our understanding of events. In this example, the children are still jumping up and down and shouting, but some of us have moved from being upset to feeling sad, compassionate, and concerned. Others may still feel angry, because they believe that children should always behave in public. Beliefs cause emotions that trigger behavior. If we feel angry about a situation and react in anger, it is because we have angry beliefs about it. If we feel compassionate, it is because we have compassionate beliefs.


PERCEPTIONS - Situations in themselves do not produce feelings. It is our perception of the situation that makes us feel good or bad. Just as situations cannot make us happy or sad, another person cannot make us feel happy or sad. We choose to be happy or sad. If we seek greater freedom in our lives, we need to be objective and rational about the power of our beliefs versus the power of situations. We control our emotions. When we live in freedom, we choose the way we respond rather than let our automatic destructive reactions get the better of us.